Letter #5

“Sometimes you will never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory.”
-Author Unknown

It happened again. The rush of memories and emotions. I stop, breathe and prepare my coffee so that I can ease into my daily routine.

Make my bed.
Prepare my coffee.
Complete my morning meditation.
Play some music.

An there it is-the song that you didn’t expect to hear. Almost as if God wanted you to listen…listen closely.  And a rush of tears flood my eyes. The lump in my throat swells to the point of it blocking my air ways. Is this what my life will be like forever? I stop immediately and softly pray for the emotions to pass.

Breathe.
I will allow the feelings to flow through me.

Yes, life is beautiful if we choose to see it. However, in these moments I can’t seem to really see, but more so feel. And I can’t help but feel it all at once.

How can I still feel if just yesterday I let go and the feels should be gone? If he only knew that him being human caused me to be in this moment months later. A moment I relive every day. All I can do is touch the ashes that were left from the flames that burned all the precious moments we lived. That’s what I have come to learn. Life happens in the small moments and they are oh so delicate.

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